Friday, June 29, 2007

That's A Mouthful


Enough of this mushy-gushy-lovey-dovey-family-and-friends stuff! Let's get dangerous and radical again! Time for another Top Ten list! I actually jotted this one down a long time ago so I could think and pray about whether or not I really wanted to do this - and, OF COURSE I WANT TO DO THIS! So, let me say at the start that we always walk on dangerous ground when we label anyone. As I've said many times, labels are so relative that they become nonsensical and meaningless (is that redundant?). Because we always start with ourselves, and we, of course, are the norm - the logical - the correct, so everyone else is either to the right or left of us - except for those few we feel truly understand and agree with us! What is a modern day Pharisee? Here are some identifiable suggestions.


You know you are a modern day Pharisee if...

1. You have to really "break" your own piece of Lord's Supper bread.

2. Everything is permissible - AFTER the magic closing prayer.

3. Real repentance only happens when a person "walks the aisle".

4. You believe a baptized twelve year old suddenly can't be taught anything from the Bible by a woman.

5. You think faithfulness is best defined by church attendance.

6. If you believe man was made for the assembly rather than the assembly made for man.

7. If you think Paul's call to follow traditions included those started in the Twentieth Century.

8. You believe every member must sing every song.

9. If every new idea makes you see "a slippery slope".

10. If a Christ-like attitude in areas of opinion is optional.


I'm glad the grace of God covers all who seek Jesus - even when we tend to be Pharisaical. Maybe the worst kind of Pharisee is the one who thinks he is better than the Pharisees. That's kind of sad - u - see. Sorry - habit!

3 comments:

Deborah said...

You've got me singing now..."I don't wanna be a Phar-i-see..."

Good top-ten list, Dad. Don't worry, I'm not offended. (hee-hee)

The Root said...

HA! Nice. These made me laugh.
1. Breaking your own bread... so the piece that cracked off from the person before you is OFF LIMITS!!
2. All I gotta mention is the chapel announcements at Harding where Dr. Burks would say, "That concludes our time of worship this morning." and then you'd know that something involving a woman was about to happen. Cuz if that woman had done something "during the assembly", it'd be a sin.
And so many other things to say, but, as Shakespeare said, "Brevity is the soul of wit" and all has already been said succinctly.

Anonymous said...

Oh my ... OH MY ... OOH MYY! This is good. This is GOOOOOOOD!
One of your best Top Ten! Keep Them Comming! When will this be a book? Mike Root's Christian Clavicals, Easy to read, often observed.